I was driving through Spanish Fork today and saw this store. Unfortunately they were not yet open for business. There was, ironically, a bed inside the store (the frame of which you can see in the window).

I have no idea what the function of this store is. I mean, it seems pretty straightforward - they make custom, life sized, weighted babies. But can that REALLY be what they do? Is there a big market in Spanish Fork for fake human offspring?

My hope is that "babies" refers to something other than the pooping, crying kind. Some people call their car their "baby," so maybe these guys make replica cars or something.

I did a little more research on the net and found that there is apparently some kind of weird market for lifelike fake babies. Enough to justify a store front in a small Utah town? Not sure...

Here's a fake baby you can buy on the Internet. Her name is Ashley, she is made of vinyl, and she breathes. Also, if you buy her (for the bargain price of $129.99 or 5 easy payments of $26) you are completely our of your damn mind. Not only are real babies free, they are a lot more fun to make yourself.

I guess I can see one upside to having fake babies: Completely crazy people will avoid actually reproducing and just settle for the vinyl alternative to childbirth. The less those people procreate, the better. By some stretch of the imagination, this might be considered a sort of birth control.

I searched around for other fake people you can buy on the Internet and was only able to find the usual assortment of inflatable girlfriends. Apparently there is not a market for fake vinyl adolescent children, fake teenagers, or fake decrepit old people. They do have fake corpses, though, so we can rest easy on that one.